ok i must admit first off. reading the last several entries may have been somewhat of a mind job for ya'll. my apologies. sort of. i really dont care that it was confusing (i mean HELLO if i wanted it to be clear cut n all it WOULD HAVE been right? like DUH already :) ) but sorry that ya'll had to be confused n everything.

*to be perfectly honest i dont quite understand some parts myself :D

i want to STAB everyone












ya'll still there?? :D
thot i'd try that one out. (the concept is taken from the SMS i sent to Chermy ---> there cherm i put it in bold so that u wont miss that i mentioned u. noe u get a kick outta that :D )

sooooo. whats been happening?
y'noe its weird. just two days ago i was totally hung up on her. like really really really really bad. (yeah still not using names. even though we ALL noe its clara im talking abt here ............... hahahahahahaha. k im losing it here) so as i was saying: really really really hung up. n now it SEEMS to have disappeared totally. guess now we'll find out how much of the friendship was just that, friendship. im really really really worried about this. as in MAJORLY worried. i dont wanna lose one iota of wat i/we had/have/will continue to have.

++besides in all likelihood it'll all come rushing back (a rush of blood to the head u cld say :D ) on tuesday or wednesday. hell it died out in the June hols and only came back stronger. we'll see i guess++

does it seem like im dwelling on this??
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good. coz i am. spent those dots there thinking abt the whole thing.

**my blog entries are becoming quite bizarra i noe. am seriously considering giving up the blog anw. considering that the creative drive i had to write and express myself, and the joy i had in daily life largely came from the whole thing and her. yeah it really was that big a deal in my existence. guess i commit too much or whatever. give my heart away easily i spose. (which, ironically enuff, is exactly what someone's dad said to some person. dunno if u remember telling me )

i suppose all i can do is play the whole thing by ear and take each situation as it comes. it is gonna feel majorly WEIRD not liking anyone (im optimistically working on the assumption here that it DOESNT come back.)

to be perfectly honest i feel somewhat incomplete. im so used to pining and so used to being in unrequited love. yeah i reckon love is merited.

---majorly weird. half the bloody CLASS has this blog. ho hum---

which reminds me: put this in the front row of LT1 on the table. check it :
ho hum
hum ho
i'll suck
u blow
we'll go
with the flow
spit out
and dont swallow!!

hahahahahahahaha is all i can say.

there's so much i want to say. n yet i cant express myself. strangely enough the person i want to talk to most of all now is the person who all my problems (well not QUITE all. mustnt exxagerate) centre arnd! spose thats a good sign for future friendship.



^^i can feel it coming back y'noe. lil by lil. thot it was dead!! lessee.... it must be a zombie of emotion then :D^^


this is a fucking fantastic song. was in Borders today listening to the matrix (1 and 2) soundtracks... both songs by them are good

Calm Like a Bomb
Feel the funk blast (whispered)
Feel the funk blast (whispered)
Well feel the funk blast
Well feel the funk blast
Well feel the funk blast
Yo Yo Yo Yo Yo Yo Yo Check it Out Yo Yo Yo

I be walkin god like a dog
My narrative fearless
Word war returns to burn
Like Baldwin home from Paris, Uh
Like steel from a furnace
I was born landless
Yes its tha native son
Born of Zapatas guns
Stroll through the shanties
And tha cities remains
Same bodies buried hungry
But with different last names
The vultures robbin everything
Leave nothing but chains
Pick a point on the globe
Yes tha pictures tha same
Theres a bank, theres a church, a myth and a hearse
A mall and a loan, a child dead at birth
Theres a widow pig parrot
A rebel to tame
A whitehooded judge
A syringe and a vein

And the riot be the rhyme of the unheard

What ya say? What ya say? What ya say? What?
What ya say? What ya say? What ya say? What?
What ya say? What ya say? What ya say? What?
What ya say? What ya say? What ya say? What?

We're calm like a bomb (Ignite)
We're calm like a bomb (Ignite)

This aint subliminal
Feel the critical mass approach horizon
Tha pulse of the condemned
Sound off Americas demise
Tha anti-myth rhythm rock shocker
Yes I spit fire
Hope lies in the smoldering rubble of empires
Yes back through tha shanties and tha cities remains
Same bodies buried hungry, uh-huh
With different last names, uh-huh
The vultures robbin everyone
Leave nothing but chains
Pick a point here at home
Yes the pictures tha same
Theres a field full of slaves
Some corn and some debt
Theres a ditch full of bodies
Tha check for the rent
Theres a tap, tha phone, tha silence of stone
The numb black screen
That be feelin like home

And the riot be the rhyme of the unheard

What ya say? What ya say? What ya say? What?
What ya say? What ya say? What ya say? What?
What ya say? What ya say? What ya say? What?
What ya say? What ya say? What ya say? What?

Calm like a bomb (Ignite)
Calm like a bomb (Ignite)
Calm like a bomb (Ignite)
Calm like a bomb (Ignite)

Calm like a bomb (Ignite)
Calm like a bomb (Ignite)
Calm like a bomb (Ignite)
Calm like a bomb (Ignite)
Calm like a bomb (Ignite)

Theres a mass without roofs
A prison to fill
Theres a countrys soul that reads post no bills
Theres a strike and a line of cops outside of tha mill
Theres a right to obey
And a right to kill

Theres a mass without roofs
Theres a prison to fill
Theres a countrys soul that reads post no bills
Theres a strike and a line of cops outside of tha mill
Cos theres a right to obey
And theres the right to kill
----Rage Against the Machine----

and with that i shall end this entry. stay tuned for more dramatic, hard-to-understand episodes of Timothy the pathetic loser who's heart rules his whole fu**ing life!!(they dont swear in ads right)

k i dont QUITE mean that. but pretty much so doncha think??
meditate upon it n get back to me. i shall fade away now.



------Goodbye luyinza------