Thursday, April 28, 2005

Ode to the End of the World, and assorted ramblings. You were expecting depth?!

It now seems it can't be stopped
So let's go out with a bang.
Let's end the show, and make damn sure
In the Firmament, Earth doesn't hang.

Nuclear war? Hell, yeah let 'er rip
Press those buttons for all we are worth.
And when the dust settles, and no man's left alive
Then cockroaches shall rule all the Earth.

Venus will laugh, Mars mourn our passing
And Jupiter will sob for his son.
But we will be gone (and its only our fault!)
So let's at least have us some fun.



+ + + + + + + + + +


Somehow I saw that one coming out slightly better than it did. And also rather longer. It's hardly an Ode to anything, except maybe an Ode to the Diminuitive.
Hell its barely long enough to be a haiku!

Its length doth shame me
Lowly do I hang my head -
Inadequacies.


Funny thing is, i may actually prefer that haiku. Never really appreciated them before.





Synchronicity

Alright its a rather grand-sounding word, dont you think? Its just the name of a concept i heard about from dominic several years ago. (time flies too damn fast. that day at tiong bahru seems like last week or something. in reality, i think its at least four years) As far as i can remember, the basic idea is that of coincidence-with-purpose-or-design. I may be wrong (like galatic cataclysmic events, this does happen once or twice a millenia) but I think that was the gist of it.



So here's my version: two weeks ago dominic (amusing how this all wouldn't have happened without him - p'raps i should explore that in greater depth) told me I had to read a book by Ursula LeGuin (quite the writer! - and that's about the understatement of the century, i'm sure many would say) called Always Coming Home. Anyone familiar with it?
Anyhow. He got the book down off his shelf, showed it to me, then said I couldn't borrow it because that would be the book he would snatch up if he was facing the End of the World - or maybe the End of His World, which is to all intents and purposes the same thing as far as he's concerned, of course - but he did highly recommend it. Also included in this list of information was the joyous speculation that I would find it very hard to get. How jolly! To be presented with a book apparently WORTH reading (unlike much of the drivel that's widely available) and then to be told i'll quite likely never get to read it.

So.

Later that day, I was at church and one of the ladies comes up to me (side note: for some reason this woman thinks that her and I are both bookworms and "buddies" because of our interest in dead flattened tree matter. She's the "Da Vinci Code" sort, get the picture? I havent' quite worked up the heart to say we're pretty much chalk and cheese... it just sounds too elitist) and says that there's a book which i simply MUST read, because its so amazing. 'cept she didn't bring it with her on that day - i'd have to wait till next week. Alright sure! i was thinking it'd be some dan brown-readalike or something.

So the next week rolls in and then i'm face to face with the same woman again. She pulls out a book, and LO AND fucking BEHOLD its the very same book! Even the same edition! The thing is, I heard about the book, was denied the book, received prophesy to the tune of "You'll never read it!" and then was given the opportunity to read the book (and strangest of all from a person i never would have expected to be the "One" to give it to me) all within one day. Just didnt know how this all fit together until the next week.


Life's a funny thing.



Question is - Pure coincidence? Or synchronicity? If you favour the former, then you're of the opinion that things just happen at random (Or maybe you're a proponent of Chaos Theory and believe that we just don't know enough about our universe yet. Fair enough). But what does it mean to favour Synchronicity? I think it must be that there's some greater design or purpose behind our lives, and ostensibly not a divine one (because its much easier to say "Oh look! It must be God!" than "Oh look! It must be Synchronicity!" .its very simple. 6 syllables versus 10) because, for real, otherwise people would just say God, methinks. Synchronicity seems to me to be an idea thought up in order to escape that.


So that means the Universe, or God, or some alien collective consciousness, wants me to read "Always Coming Home". Who knows - after reading this, you might have someone come up to you and offer you a copy of it as well. In which case I will have been an instrument of the Universe, God, or some Alien Collective Consciousness. Rather a cumbersome title - plus it'd make the world's longest name tag!




Walk this way - Aerosmith

Monday, April 18, 2005

As soldiers, we sometimes just know when a cause becomes something we can't fight for any more. Somewhere down the line, when we're fighting hand-to-hand in the enemy trenches, battling tooth and nail, hand and claw, we realize - even while fighting for our lives - that we should just give up. That whatever point there was to start with has been so blunted by bloodshed and hate that it's now completely pointless. That no matter how hard we try, no matter how many enemies we conquer, no matter how many unwashed unbelieving infidels we strive to convince and convert, through force of arms or scintillating weapons of wit, we will never succeed.


Some would say my effort to educate people on the merits of Limp Bizkit is such a war without any hope of true progress. That no matter what arguments i put before an unenlightened public, they will remain unable to attain satori. Such advisors would counsel me to give up, having fought the good fight, and ride off into the sunset, unbowed, undefeated, but ultimately unsuccessful. I, however, respond to such naysayers by loudly crying NO! Never shall I retire from this field of battle. Relentlessly will I continue; being only one, I shall strike from the shadows when there is naught to see me, and slowly, slowly, but steadily shall I follow my chosen plan of attrition. I'll push, push and keep pushing, until finally, at last I shall have all listening to the greatest rap-metal band on Earth!



*please insert evil laughter here*


Alright that's all I'll say on that. I thought i'd turn one or two sentences (which would've expressed about the same thing - but in far less words. Where's the fun in that?) into a rather longer bit of entertainment - if only for me. But hey in the end that's what this whole rigmarole is about, isn't it. Good old numero uno.


(the secret's out!)


+ + + + + +


I dont write half as much as i'd like to these days, and the stuff I write half the time isn't half as good as I'd like. (Anyone remember good old Bilbo?). Still, there's really nothing to be done for it. Life gets more and more hectic the older i grow (by Jove! The Second Law pops up again!) and time constraints well, constrain, more and more. Sorta like that giant monstrosity ... what's it called. Anaconda yeah that's it. Now THERE'S an analogy that hasnt been heard! Sure, we've got "Life only gets worse", "It only stops when you're dead" and all that jolly shit. But "Life is an Anaconda that only grows bigger"? Ain't nobody never said that!


Its pretty said, because not a day goes by where there isn't something I'd like to write about - if only to preserve that day's special thought or insight (there's always at least one) for posterity. But more often than not I don't get around to it, and that thought flits away, a brief sparking of neurons which is almost certainly a one-off.



* * * * * *

Time ticks by
My, how it flies,
We watch it pass
And hardly grasp
How soon our eyes
Will close
Forever.


^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^


Rather morbid I must say
In fact I don't know why I said it.
I wonder what you lot will think
Just after you have read it?
Will you blink and scratch your head
Or p'raps some less nice place?
I don't really care, I'll sit and stare
At that vague look on your face.

Once done with looking i'll stand up
Walking off into the stars
I'll make one or two quick stops
Maybe Mercury and Mars.
I doubt that I will stay for long
(The first one's pretty hot)
I'll try and avoid small li'l men
I don't want to get shot.

When I'm done with those two planets
I'll head off to pretty stars
White dwarfs, red suns, big black holes
And those strange ones called pulsars.
When I'm done with all that stuff
I'll probably head on back.
And then, being pretty tired
I'll maybe hit the sack.


~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Deepest, darkest, hidden desires
Trip the light fantastic tonight
They're dancing, dancing all over the place
Watch out or you'll get a fright.

Sunday, April 10, 2005

Alright this's been boiling inside for quite a while now, and its about time I let it all out.


JUST WHY THE FUCK DO SOME PEOPLE HATE LIMP BIZKIT SO MUCH?


ok now I'm aware that some people may regard this as something of a ridiculous question, rather akin to "why is the sky blue?" or "why is the sun yellow?". However, I put it to you, ladies and gentlemen: there is a logical and correct answer to the second and third question - no, they're not ridiculous things to ask - but for the life of my fucking green TURTLE i can't find a good answer - well perhaps a satisfactory answer would be a better phrase - to the first one.



Ok so let's break it down ("break it down one time say wha--at"). We've got a pretty talented band. (I rate DJ Lethal far higher than that snivelly little pissant from Linkin Park. Lester Hahn or some such). We've got pretty catchy riffs and stuff. More importantly, we've got what was, at one stage, one of the biggest new rock bands in the WORLD. (time was when it seemed like EVERYBODY owned a copy of "Significant Other" - these days everybody seems ashamed of it or something). Then there's the fact that - and you can say what you will. I cant hear you, anyway - Fred Durst is pretty damn good at chanelling anger, rage, angst...... EMOTION.

Then you've got great songs. Now i'll be the first to admit, "Rollin' " isnt exactly "Bohemian Rhapsody" in terms of sheer brilliance, freshness and daring. But it IS a pretty catchy song. And everybody knows it. Then there was "Take A Look Around" (off the MI:2 soundtrack) with that nice little riff going thruout the song. It says something, dont you think, that they were asked to do the.... what's the term.... title? lead? first? track for a movie like that?

Yeah of course it says something. it says that THEY'RE PRETTY DAMN GOOD. that's what it says.



Best thing about them is that they dont stick to just one sound. You've got pretty clean rock (Just Like This) then you've got the mixed-up hard stuff a la Korn (Pollution) and even some nice slow ones (Boiler, Rearranged).


I know that rap-metal/hardcore rock/whatever-the-fuck-you-label-it-i-really-dont-care isn't for everyone. But for those people that it IS for - the blessed few - i just wish i could understand how you can ignore a band that makes pretty decent music, and fun to listen to at that. (I especially appreciate that they dont get too caught up in the whole image thing. I hate that a LOT. but then again, maybe that's why people dont like Limp. Because they DONT do the image thing. you know how humans are).


But anyway. I think people might just hate the band because of stupid reasons like "Oh Fred Durst's a poseur he doesnt skate that good when he says he used to be sponsored" and stupid shit like that. i mean COME ON listen to a band/group/orchestra/soloist because of the music they make. An analogy: dont ignore a copy of Dune just because of shitty artwork!



Think about it.

Friday, April 01, 2005

The Second Law of Thermodynamics - as applied to LAN shops.

Alright so i've got a pretty damn glorious title up there don't I? Surely that must mean there's going to be some amazingly insightful text to read below, right?

Right??


Well anyway. As the loyal readers (if any) amongst you surely know, I like using the second law of thermodynamics in my writing a fair bit. (For those who are interested, the last time i checked there were 3 laws. Basically they can be summed up like this:
1. You can't win.

2. Everybody loses.

3. You can't get out of the game.

Short, succint, slightly cheesy, but pretty accurate, all things considered.)

Quick recap: The Second Law states that within any closed system (read: a house, a society, a planet, a universe etc.) the amount of chaos within that system will, over time, increase, and only increase. The idea is that entropy will continually march forward under all conditions and in all circumstances (because when you get down to it, everything counts as a closed system). And its pretty true. Civilizations collapse (name one that hasnt. Present ones notwithstanding, of course. Our being alive now negates any ability to pass judgment.), things grow all and die, even bedrooms get steadily more messed up as calender pages pass away. Think about it. The Law works.


But then again its all very good to KNOW something, but to know something is, well, something else, isn't it? if you catch my drift. We're all creatures of emotion and illogical thought, no matter what we'd like to think to the contrary.

So! To the crux of the matter.
There's this cybercafe in Thomson Plaza that I've been going to since God knows when. If I had to guess (and i dont, really, but i'd like to) i'd say its been about four or five years at least. I'm friends with the owners of the place, and also the fifty or so guys who've worked in the shop. Its like i've seen the place grow up, in a bizarre sense: from a shop which dealt solely in CS (incidentally one of the greatest games of all time, in my opinion. Proof: its been around for 8 years at least and its still going strong) to a real souped-up place with pretty much any game you could want. Within reasonable limits, of course.

It seemed like it'd always be there. A permanent place I could head to whenever there wasn't much to do, or when my fingers were feeling a little antsy. And yet, just yesterday it closed.
Entropy set in, and the shop, having been increasingly poorly maintained over time, eventually became too lousy for anyone serious to want to go there. Business got bad, then worse, then "no fucking way am I wasting more money on this", and so on Thursday, the 31st of March, 2005, finally came the night they called it a day.

Thing is, my mind could hardly wrap itself around the idea of this shop not existing. It'd always been a place of fun and swearing and good old horsing around, of typical male bonhomie. And then as if someone did no more than flick a switch, it was gone. Good old law number two had run its course, and that was that.


It made me sit back and think, it really did. The thoughts I was thinking weren't particularly original - but then what really is? - but they were important. This, in a way, drove home the impermanence of things, and the idea that everything is in a constant state of flux, if one can only think on a sufficiently broad enough time-scale.


So what's the conclusion i've drawn from all of this? Nothing lasts. Now i'm not taking a nihilistic approach to Life, the Universe and Everything, neither am i about to say So Long, and Thanks for all the Fish (I may, however, wish to dine at The Restaurant at the End of the Universe sometime soon). But I'm definitely in a frame of mind at the moment that is somewhat cynical.


Cynical cynical cynical
everything's always inimical
to you, it does seem
everything's so damn mean.
Oh and things are always political.

++++++++++




I wish you were here.




i adorn myself with lies you see
until you barely can perceive
the weaknesses i try and heave
outta the fucken door

but just because i hide them well
dont mean that everything is swell
and trust me, people, time will tell:
i'll crumble soon for sure.