KATE BECKINSALE

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THAT'S her name. spent the last two hours trying to remember it. it went "ok, she was in Pearl Harbor with Josh Hartnett and Ben Affleck, and her name is Kate ..... Kate..... ah fuck la!!"

VERY annoying. also very trivial. but that's how it goes!



so anyhow. skipped Fahy once more with mar. dont think we can again next week la. came away with my HIGHLY important red pen. there's a story there, but its too long to recount. plus it aint that funny. so fuck that, too.



slip inside the evermore
and stare into infinity
notice how it seems a most curious shade of blue?
people often think
that infinite space is black
but i'm telling you quite seriously its blue. It's true!!



i read an interesting explanation once (a serious scientific one, actually) that really did say infinite space would be blue. something to do with light and the Doppler effect. can't remember enough to explain it in a lucide manner.


which reminds me of "elucidate". i'm fucking sad things turned out the way they did in that area.


"they say to me, "My boyfriend and I don't ever fight." like it's an accomplishment." Actually in my book, far from being an accomplishment, not fighting is incredibly unhealthy. i'm a firm believer in the idea espoused by Frank Herbert (and others; he was by no means the first to think this way) that the human race as it is in present time and day is unable to continue without chaos - i.e. conflict. we are, as a race, warlike and divided. The Second Law of Thermodynamics applies to us quite perfectly. so you see, not fighting, as described in the nick above, would actually be an inhuman restraint of natural desires.


aside from all of that, its also a bloody strange nic. as are most of them, for some reason.



to resist is to piss in the wind
anyone who does will end up smelling
knowing this why do i defy?
coz my inner voice is yelling



and sometimes that's just it, isn't it? no matter how stupid or futile, we continue our little struggles. our little games, our little wars, our little arguments. because on some level we just feel we have to.

fucking stupid, aren't we all?



tie the rope around your neck
hold on, dont let go quite yet
stand your feet up on that chair
hide the noose within your hair
make yourself presentable
demure, so sweet and frenchable
gather all your thoughts together
think of Tom, Michelle and Heather
check to see the note's still there
on the table, by the chair
yes it is, so now you're ready
move to the edge now. keep it steady
let's count together. one, two, three
now step off and die, so happily.



i don't even know where that came from. nah i aint ever committing suicide dont worry.



"deicide" is a pretty cool-sounding word. even tho it does mean to kill God.





pity and hate
spin round in my head
like Yin and Yang



*i've got people who like my poetry!!! well, "person", rather, at the moment. but still!! thanks mar :D


where do all emotions go
once through the brain they have all flowed?
is there a big recycling bin
where all emotions get dumped in?
out of which some being picks
out random ones and in me sticks
anger, hatred, peace and love
violence and gentle-as-a-dove
perhaps.



bouquet of clumsy words
a simple melody
this world's an ugly place
but you're so beautiful ~
TO TRAVIS!!!


that's how i've been singing it all day, so that's how it'll be :)


"Who likes the Skippy??!!"



martian penis friends. hahahaahahahahahaah that's just RIDICULOUS aint it :D



i think that's my time. g'nite folks!!